It is too… clean? The lighting is too “perfect”. Each object is an idea rather than an image to be interpreted. It conforms to what instagram considers to be realistic.

This is a mirror of human delusion averaged and contorted to gaze into itself, and as such I abhor it.

Me when I am sniffing every flower I pass, greeting every cat I see, and cherishing the transient crown of health.

Omg Lego Batman 2 hiiii

Thank you! Have a [raccoons photo] (https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/4cd579d3-be4b-488e-9131-74d4810a9006.jpeg)

Hi I really like raccoons but have not seen this video. Do you have a link to this video?

How much sawdust transphobia can you put in rice crispies a politician before people notice care enough to complain?

Also did he just do the “I have a black friend” thing with his godson? Because it kind of seems like he just did almost exactly that.

Cheese but I put minty toothpaste on them to make them temporarily taste like mint until they taste like cheese again.

Can’t have shit in material reality demiurge done stole my voice

Oh no, my face scan was leaked! I guess I have no choice other than to fill myself with estrogen in order to reshape its fatty tissues, something I would absolutely not have done otherwise. Oh no!

(sarcasm disclaimer: this is sarcastic)

Ahaha that’s so cheeky! Delightful

Opened cookie book. Followed directions. Suddenly had delicious cookies. Realized that I could do this with other things.

“Attention Bajoran workers”

The gigantic orb of burning hate in the sky, high-energy screams raging outward as proclamation of its destiny to eventually devour gaia’s refuge once and for all?

Humans say that the sun gives the gift of life, but it’s really just giving them cancer if it sees them for too long. Checkmate mortalists.

She bought avocado toast!

*crowd gasps*

She partook of the forbidden fruit!

*loud outraged murmuring*

And now she wants to have… A HOUSE!

*the crowd reaches a crescendo, screams are heard, a man falls to the ground, froth spilling from his mouth*

“does she really think she could handle that responsibility??”

You went into stem? You studied… computer science?? And you expect to be employable with that skillset???

Chili pancakes

Makin’ chili pancakes

Took some chili and I put it on a pancake

Which is basically pizza, right?

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