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Cake day: October 1st, 2023

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  • Older Norwegians can be quite xenophobic, particularly in rural areas, and there was a jarring difference in how white Ukrainian refugees were welcomed in some communities compared to e.g. Somalians. Some mandatory “how to live in Norway” classes are also one-size-fits all in a way some will find offensive.

    A friend of mine who lived in Norway for a while found it quite offensive to be taught not to light a fire on the floor, for instance (someone from a less developed country did that decades ago, now everyone is told not to). There was apparently also commentary about smelly foods in apartment buildings. While considering your neighbors is a good way to fit in, it can be hard not to view this as an insult to your native cousine, and I also think that concern is rather dated.

    The biggest issue most immigrants face in Norway is that Norwegians come off as hard to approach. I don’t know if you’re familiar with the “Seattle freeze”, but I suspect that’s just stemming from a lot of ethnic Norwegians living there for decades. This can be overcome by learning more about Norwegian (and really Nordic) etiquette, though.

    The default assumption for a Norwegian is that your personal space should be respected. We don’t approach you unless you signal in some way that you want to be approached. This signaling is something all Norwegians do unconsciously, but for a foreigner not accustomed to the signals, it looks a lot like they’re getting the cold shoulder.

    Say for instance you’re waiting for some public transport. It’s been a while, no one is talking or even looking at each other, and you want to chat with someone. Just starting a conversation with someone would be seen as rude, since that is basically just imposing a conversation on them that they don’t want. A lot of Americans do this, and it is part of the reason Americans are viewed as abrasive (along with their constant bragging about America).

    What a Norwegian would do in that situation would be to throw out a statement to no one in particular. Something like a comment on how late the bus is, or the weather. If no one reacts, that means they don’t feel like chatting. But more often than not, someone will respond. You have now both signaled that you want to talk, and may pivot the conversation to whatever topics you feel like chatting about.

    That being said, the language barrier is also a real thing. While most Norwegians under the age of 50 speak perfect English and will pivot to it the second they hear an accent (not helpful if you’re trying to learn Norwegian, but they can’t help themselves), they will default to talking Norwegian. At college parties I’ve seen this often result in exchange students chatting in separate groups from the Norwegians. This can feel jarring compared to how people experience going to a country where they know the local language, like America.















  • Different scope, though. I don’t think quarter or no quarter affects the whole country’s willingness to surrender (the chance of that is basically zero either way), but it does affect individuals. If you have a few enemy combatants holed up somewhere, it could cost you a lot of people, ammo and time you’d rather spend somewhere else to take them out. They know they can’t win, and it’s either surrender or die. But if surrender means death, they’ll definitely not surrender. Now you need to eliminate them the hard way.

    Of course, doing it that way requires more resources, which I guess is good for business in the military industrial complex.